What’s Different Vs What’s Similar

I’m seated here at local restaurant wondering to myself, do we all have that moment in life where we think to ourselves damn! I’ve changed! Either for good or for bad doesn’t matter because change is inevitable right?. No matter what we’ve become we aren’t who we were a few days, weeks, months or decades ago. In whatever case, I tend to believe change is good, scary at times, but good.

Being on the third floor, seems like a life changing event……don’t you think?. To me it’s 50 50. On one side, it feels great to come to the realisation that there are a few things that I do differently and there are those that are still the same. For instance,I feel mature (a little) and have grown to appreciate myself a little bit more but I’m still struggling with other things such as finding purpose in life. It’s pretty much amazing that nothing has changed over night and it’s all a gradual process.

I thought it would be fun to round up some of the biggest changes that I’ve realised and what seems similar in my 30s compared to my 20s.

SAME: I’M STILL TRYING TO FIGURE LIFE OUT

Let me be honest, I remember when I turned 25 I said to myself ” by the time I’m 30, I’d be the CEO of my own company and I’d be driving a Rolls Royce”… (Big dreams aye!). WOW!! That’s not the case ( but I’m working towards that though). Looking at my life now, I am not where I wanted to be and I haven’t figured out life yet, but I am happy and I am more focused. Up to this time, I have a million questions about life and I have a million mistakes to make. Nonetheless, I am trying to figure out my purpose in life and what I want in life. When I look around, I see people in there 50s, 60s and even 70s are still trying to reinvent and better themselves. So cheers to figuring life out!!

DIFFERENT: HANGOVERS ARE REAL

I used to be able to party all night (still do), but now, a night of drinking requires more recovery time than a minor surgery….(Hahaha i’m still cool though). After a night out of drinking a concoction of drinks, hangover hurts more than having my wisdom teeth taken out. That said doesn’t mean I’m done enjoying my Jack Daniels and cocktails.

SAME: MANAGING FINANCES ISN’T MY STRONG SUIT

I must confess that when it comes to finances I am still a rookie. I can’t compare to my 20s but I have become much better at saving money and setting financial goals for the future. One of my new years resolution for 2019 is to become better at managing finances and I cant wait to share more on how I am doing it.

DIFFERENT: I DON’T CARE WHAT PEOPLE THINK

In my previous blog “letter to my younger self” this is one of the advice I give my younger self. Growing up and throughout my 20s caring about what people had to say about me or their opinions about my life used to cripple me. Talk about wasting time!! I no longer try to fit in or be what people want me to be. Yes, I still think of what a few chosen people think, but I don’t live life based off of it.

SAME: I’M STILL CHASING THAT DREAM JOB

For most of us I am sure we are not yet working at our dream jobs (be it employed or not). For those in their 20s maybe the job you are in right now might be what you landed in your laps immediately after campus. Whereas for those in our 30s maybe we spent a decade deciding what to do with our career. Hopefully we will all move into a role that better suits our passions and skills. In the mean time, most of us are still trying to find that dream job that doesn’t feel like work.

DIFFERENT: I’M MORE COMFORTABLE IN MY OWN
“The moment will arrive when you are comfortable with who you are, and what you are– bald or old or fat or poor, successful or struggling- when you don’t feel the need to apologise for anything or to deny anything. To be comfortable in your own skin is the beginning of strength.” Charles Handy Thank gad for realising this!

OK your turn! What have you seen a change in and what feels exactly the same?

47 Comments

  1. I feel like you speak my life…you’re my mirror…I’m usually like, “she gets me , she gets it “….. Level 3, best time of my life so far…

  2. I had to sneak out of practice to read this and it’s sad or happy I can resonate so much to this particular article….. And I’ll definitely read it again after this session. Loved it you are growing with every article… Awesome. Proud of you.

      1. I’ve seen changes in my attitude towards so many things in life. How I perceive life is different how I perceive and see people is also so different. I am so open to all kind of things I don’t expect anyone to treat me like a queen or a princess coz disappointments are a sore thumb to handle.. one sad thing that I feel that hasn’t changed is how sometime my heart feels….. It just doesn’t learn but I am still optimistic and tell myself daily I’ll love with the whole of me even if it’s broken I’ll pay myself and tell me babe you did your best you ain’t the problem. So cheers to lessons learnt.

        1. Ooh wow! That’s an in-depth analysis of what’s changed and what’s still similar. When it comes to matters of the heart we all take a leap of faith and hope for the best. No matter the outcome, it’s always a lesson. So keep the fire burning and believe in yourself. The world is ready for your magic!!

  3. I can totally relate,I have come to realize that clubing all through the night have a very high price to pay the next day, not to mention my precious sleep 😴.
    And am yet to find my dream job which feels more like a hobby🤪.
    I love love this piece cuz💕

    1. Thank you Cousin. That dream job is what I’m also chasing. I’m sure it’s around the corner. All we need to do is believe and have a little bit more faith. The world will be our Oyster ❤

  4. The article is awesome I honestly enjoyed reading it. I have changed in the manner that I now don’t let negative people get the best of me. I still struggle with managing my finances but that’s one of my New Years goal.

  5. Wow. You make me get into thinking deep. Just realize that the unhighlighted me, i, my, our in myself remains the same, and still comfortable.
    Different is that the you, your, from ‘otherself’ is no bother anymore. Nice piece gal

  6. Life can only be understood backwards; but it must be lived forwards. – …
    Awesome writing.
    Can’t wait the one bout financial management and dependency.

    Kudos Penny

  7. Wow, this is an awesome piece. I am loving your blog each time. Personally I have come to appreciate my journey and value myself more. I used to be a people pleaser but not anymore. If you don’t value me as much then you don’t deserve a seat at my table.
    I have also come to appreciate that everyone one has a different journey that is unique and different destinations. Enjoy life while at it

  8. I feel like you talking about me but the different is,am still down on managing my finances or maybe i have a lot of responsibilities.

  9. I am yet to get to tier 3, but this really resonates. True, I have changed along the way. Still confused about a lot of things but at the same time, I look back and realize that through it all…the tears, blood and sweat, the highs and the lows, it’s all for my becoming. And perhaps I am a little new me everyday. Crawled out of depression, lost family and friends I thought I never would, watched my life COMPLETELY turn around. Again, all in my becoming. I am grateful,and if I could change anything, I wouldn’t change a thing.
    Beautiful piece Penny.

    1. Thank you darling and don’t forget I’m always around the corner to cheer you up. In life you lose some you gain some. It’s balance. We might not like it but it makes us better people.

  10. This is such an accurate article. I feel like when I turned 30, something went off, and another came on. It was a the realization of I am at a time of calmness and stability. My 20s were a beautiful mess, decorated with plenty of mistakes that I can’t afford now. I’ve really embraced life and I’m walking in my purpose as an individual, a wife and a mother. Life can only get better. I love being 30.

  11. good piece sis. change is the only thing thats constant with exception to matters of the heart. I still believe in loyalty and trust first before love that hasnt changed much. I know hindsight is 20/20 and thats why often I look at relationships from a three generational standpoint; our grandparents(maternal and paternal) and our immediate folks and look at those values in contrast to now. The things they delt with and what we have to deal from a relationship standpoint. The values have remained the same but the context has changed. The same pressures we deal are not the same ones they did. Yet, even with advent of Tinder, social media, match and others it hasnt made easier to find the person you want any easier. Its a journey we are on and keep the faith penny.

  12. Reading this felt like you’re penning my heart out on a paper. Growth is inevitable, change is a choice scary as it may appear but its good and important. Being confident, at peace and passionate with what you do and who you are is the discovery of happiness and subsequently your purpose. Seeking to be more, to learn more, to build a career, to travel, to meet new people and to inspire others to grow is what life is……..This is exactly what you’re doing with this blog. Thank You.

    1. Aaaaaawww Thank you a million and one times. That really touched my heart. I live for moments like these❤❤ I’m glad you can relate to what I write and you can connect with it too.

  13. Great…
    I am still looking for my dream job…that said I’ve learnt to enjoy my life journey and honestly I love and appreciate it even more…
    Looking forward to the next piece…

  14. Change for me was scary especially when I relocated from Kenya. I was all alone had very little knowledge of what I had gotten myself into but later on, change that was scary became comfortable, and whenever someone asks me how do I stand with being away from family ?. That small skip of the heart hits me like I had forgotten.
    I later learned that if you do stuff to please people you are actually doing stuff they want not stuff you want in short instead of trying to please yourself you out there pleasing someone else more reasons to live life and don’t care what people say.
    Good stuff always enjoy reading your articles and already looking forward to the next. (no pressure) lol.

  15. Your articles are life babe.
    I live vicariously through you.
    I’m so proud of you and the recognizable growth in your life.
    Cheers to living, laughing and loving.

  16. Better late than never….you are maturing like fine wine gal.they say it matures with age.what matters is never to give up,..when you fall short of your own expectations..rise up and try again.i have learnt a lot.thank you

  17. Am yet to be on the third floor but i can relate alot,, am still trying to learn some of the lessons,, reading this gives me inspiration that lessons are worth it and am gonna make it
    inspiring ,, thank you ❤️

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